Theodore's World: Just a Little of This and That

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October 24, 2009

Just a Little of This and That




Love the Navy

The Navy Chief noticed a new seaman and barked at him, "Get over here! What's your name sailor?"

"John," the new seaman replied.

"Look, I don't know what kind of bleeding-heart pansy crap they're teaching sailors in boot camp nowadays, but I don't call anyone by his first name," the chief scowled. "It breeds familiarity, and that leads to a breakdown in authority. I refer to my sailors by their last names only; Smith, Jones, Baker, whatever. And you are to refer to me as 'Chief'. Do I make myself clear?"

"Aye, Aye Chief!"

"Now that we've got that straight, what's your last name?"

The seaman sighed. "Darling, My name is John Darling, Chief."

"Okay, John, here's what I want you to do ....."


......Thank you SSGT Steve


SSgt Steve
1st MarDiv, H Co., 2nd Bn, 5th Marine Regiment
2/5 Marines, Motto: "Retreat, Hell"
VN 66-67


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A Zebra dies and arrives at the Pearly Gates.. As he enters, he asks St. Peter, 'I have a question that's haunted me all of my days on earth... Am I white with black stripes, or am I black with white stripes?'

St. Peter said, 'That's a question only God can answer.'

So the zebra went off in search of God.

When he found Him, the zebra asked, 'God, please - I must know. Am I white with black stripes, or am I black with white stripes?'

God simply replied 'You are what you are.'

The zebra returned to see St. Peter once more, who asked him, 'Well, did God straighten out your query for you?'

The zebra looked puzzled.. 'No sir, God simply said 'You are what you are.''

St. Peter smiled and said to the zebra, 'Well then, there you are... You are white with black stripes..'

The zebra asked St. Peter, 'How do you know that for certain?'

'Because,' said St. Peter, 'If you were black with white stripes, God would have said, 'You is what you is.'

WARNING: If you laugh at this, Al Sharpton, Jesse Jackson, Rev Wright and Obama will be comin after yo white ass!!!


.

GEEK TO GUIDO



....Thank you Jack for sending this to me.

Army Combat Engineers
Quang Tri & Chu Lai '68 -'69
67-69
United States Army
1965-1971
Vietnam
1968-1969
Jack's blog is Conservative Insurgent



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A Bears fan had 50 yard line tickets for the Super Bowl. A man came down and asked if anyone is sitting in the seat next to him. "No", he said, "the seat is empty". "This is incredible", said the man. "Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Super Bowl, the biggest sporting event in the world, and not use it?"

Somberly, the fan said, "Well...the seat actually belongs to me. I was supposed to come here with my wife, but she
passed away. This is the first Super Bowl we have not been together since we got married in 1967."

"Oh I'm sorry to hear that. That's terrible. But couldn't you find someone else - a friend or relative or even a neighbor to take the seat?" The fan shook his head, "No. They're all at the funeral."


Confucius say....

If you can't find the book you want


You're probably shopping at the...............


Welcome to America


A beautiful fairy appeared one day to a destitute refugee who was waiting outside a Maryland immigration office..

'Good man,' the fairy said, 'I've been sent here by President Obama and the Democrats in Congress and was told to grant you three wishes because of you having just arrived in the United States with your wife and three children.'


The man told the fairy. 'Well, where I come from we don't have good teeth, so I want new teeth, maybe a lot of gold in them.'


The fairy looked at the man's almost toothless grin and -- PING ! -- he had a brand new shining set of gold teeth in his mouth!

'What else?' asked the fairy, 'two more to go.'


The refugee now got bolder. 'I need a big house with a three car garage in Annapolis on the water with eight bedrooms for my family and the rest of my relatives who still live in my country. I want to bring them all over here ..... PING ! in the distance there could be seen a beautiful mansion with a three car garage, a long driveway, a walkout patio with a BBQ in an upscale neighborhood overlooking the bay.

'One more wish', said the fairy, waving her wand.


'Yes, one more wish. I want to be like an American with American clothes instead of these torn clothes, and a baseball cap instead of this turban. And I want to have white skin like Americans . ......


PING ! The man was transformed, wearing worn out jeans, a Baltimore Orioles T-shirt and a baseball cap. He had his bad teeth back and the mansion had disappeared from the horizon.

'What happened to my new teeth?' he wailed. 'Where is my new house?'


The fairy said 'Tough Shit, Mohammed, Now that you are a White American,you have to fend for yourself.


......Thank you RAC for sending this to me.

RAC has a website that is awesome. 336th Assault Helicopter Company

13th Combat Aviation Battalion - 1st Aviation Brigade - Soc Trang, Republic of Vietnam



.

WHO Does Their Landscaping????



VIAGRA COMPANY HEADQUARTERS


....Thank you Mark for sending this to me.

Mark
3rd Mar.Div. 1st Battalion 9th Marine Regiment
1/9 Marines aka The Walking Dead
VN 66-67


Posted by Wild Thing at October 24, 2009 05:40 AM


Comments

LMAO, John Darling! Etiquette!!! I worked for years with a guy who went by the handle of Pappy, his given name was Jewel, Evelyn, Last name. Now if you wanted a sudden ass kicking just call him by either given name, Pappy decked a supervisor one day who thought he'd try that given name on for size. Fighting will get you fired most anywhere but in this case the second liner told that first liner, "leave him alone, next time he just might kill you". Roughnecks and Roustabouts in the oil patch, gotta love 'em.

Posted by: Jack at October 24, 2009 02:30 PM


Can I purchase some of that... fertilizer?
You should see how the spring rains enhance their... growth?

Posted by: darthcrUSAderworldtour07 at October 24, 2009 07:04 PM


LOL thanks everyone.
Thanks Jack and Darth for your comments.

Posted by: Wild Thing at October 24, 2009 11:39 PM